Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Randomize
