i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
This is not my ceiling
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize
