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i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Can I color on your dick again?
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Randomize