we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
