Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
