i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
