There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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