I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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