You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize