im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
you will always have a special place in my vag
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
