is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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