She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize