Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
how does that bad decision feel?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
