im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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