oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
