Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
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Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
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Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Randomize