So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
