thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
