I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize