this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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