We're like a lot better than the average bears
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
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