did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
that's an acceptable place to lick
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
handjob tips. give me some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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