Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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