wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
she told me i tasted like america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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