I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
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