I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
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