Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
