Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
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