Do vagina's smell?
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
