I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
