I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
