i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
We have started to decorate penises.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
