What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
