Who did Billy Mays play for?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Everclear isn't food dammit
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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