So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Banned from zoo.
Again?
My cat gives me a boner
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
