so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
