I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
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