Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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