dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Randomize
