i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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