nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize