I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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