Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I AM VODKA MAN
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Randomize
