cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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