playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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