You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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