Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
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