scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize