Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize