I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
