he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
