More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Randomize
