You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize